This Question Hit Me Like a Ton of Bricks

I do things with intention, which is generally a good thing.

I go to the gym to feel healthier. I take on projects to help colleagues. I read to learn more about the world.

Until earlier this year, few actions in my life were without some sort of purpose.

However, I was listening to a podcast that I enjoy the other day, and a quote really stood out to me.

“Does everything NEED to be intentional?” one of the podcasters asked before answering their own question.

“You can just feel.”

As someone who was a self-proclaimed (and proven) nerd growing up, my late-blooming awareness that I lacked emotional intelligence hit me like a ton of bricks as an adult. While I’m good at thinking through problems in a logical way, I have often lacked the capability to process my feelings or empathize with others’ emotions.

I’ve been working on this, but the host’s question still resonated with me.

We can try a new thing, do an activity on a whim or dive into an endeavor without all of the details or an ulterior motive. While I still recommend setting up safeguards for yourself, I’m asking myself — and I’d encourage you to ask yourself, too: What’s something I want to do that I can do for no reason?

Maybe you’re on the opposite end of the spectrum, and this advice won’t apply to you. But, for me, a Type-A planner, I’m going to just try something and sit with my feelings while doing so.

Those emotions could be great; I could try something that will bring me happiness or satisfaction. I could also try something that makes me truly FEEL. And that scares me.

For instance, I have spent months hyping myself up to finish a grief journal. Because of this, I haven’t just jumped in recklessly and let my thoughts take me wherever. I know it’ll hurt, but getting out my unfiltered thoughts will be so effective on my path to healing. On a more positive note, I haven’t tried something impulsive in a while, read a book I randomly ripped off the library shelves or done something that pushed me out of my comfort zone.

Trying something for feel vs. approaching a choice logically scares me a lot. It’s super out of character.

However, I think putting myself in that position to “just feel” will help me learn about myself.

While the goal is truly to see where a random choice can take me, I do believe it could also help me with interpersonal relationships, creative work and more.

But for now, who’s diving in the deep end with me?